London calling.
London Walks connecting.
This… is London.
This is London Walks.
Streets ahead.
Story time. History time.
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A very good afternoon to you, London Walkers, one and all. It’s March 12th, 2025.
Let us go then, you and I, on a tour of Regency London. That’s right, back we go, 225 years.
And where in Regency London are we going, you ask? And how do we get back there?
Well, the answer to the first question is, we’re going all over Regency London. We’re going to touch down in maybe a hundred different locales. Different locales the length and breadth of Regency London.
And as for how we’re going to do it, maybe think of those 3D glasses. We’re going to look at place names – for the most part street names – and the fact of the matter is, looking at street names is like looking at a 3D film through 3D glasses. As we all know, don those 3D glasses at a 3D film It’s KABOOM! – the viewing experience is, as the saying goes, enhanced. You want to tour Regency London 225 years after the fact, just walk into those groves of street names. They’re your 3D glasses.
How does the great poet Carol Ann Duffy put it,
What everyone does
is sit by a desk
and stare at the view, till the time
where they live reappears. Mostly in words.
Mostly in words. In this instance, place names, street names.
And I’ve made it easy for you. I’ve done some classifying. And I’m going to do some guiding. I’ve picked out the streets we’re going to go to.
First point, Regency London wasn’t gazing at its navel. It was aware, it was reflecting the big wide world. Dozens of its street names attest to that. There was America Square, America Terrace, America Court. There was China Court and China Terrace. There was the German Chapel and the Swedish Church and Muscovy Court and Paris Place and India House and Cape of Good Hope and Quebeck Row and Jamaica Place and Poland Street and Portugal Street and Honduras Wharf and Gibralter Row and Spanish Place and Prussian Island (wonder where that was, how did that name come about on that particular patch of London ground? Sorry to have to tell you, it, like a lot of these names, dost tease us out of thought. In short, it’s lost in the mists of time. Don’t go haring off to the London Encyclopedia, there’s no entry for Prussian Island. Similarly, no point in heading up to the Milky Way and beyond – heading out into the trackless wastes of the Internet – do so and you’ll draw a blank). Prussian Island – where it was, why it was Prussian Island – is now a black hole. It’s one London horizon that’s not giving up its secret.
But three that do come swimming into our ken – three for the road so to speak – are Ireland Yard, the Scotch Church and Virginia Street.
Oh and let’s not forget Ocean Street. I’m guessing it will have led down to a dock or wharf – a dock or wharf replete with big sailing vessels and the Thames getting into its stride, getting broad-shouldered and on its way.
Ok, moving on. How about animals and Regency London? The place wasn’t a zoo, it was a jungle. We poke around in the past to see what’s unchanged over the centuries – those promontories make it easier to identify with our forebears, they were here too – but also head on back there to see how things we’re different. How their lives, their London differed from ours. And when it comes to our finned and feathered and furry friends, this place was a different cup of tea 225 years ago. Today, the place is a pet shop. Dogs, cats, birds, foxes and some vermin – some rats and mice – and that’s about it. Some vermin is putting it mildly. Some estimates say there are 20 million rats in London’s sewers. That’s more than two rats for each of us.
Anyway, be that as it may, the London of 1800 was a jungle and a barnyard in comparison with our London. And there is still some trace evidence of those days clinging to the wreckage, so to speak. Place names like Cow Cross Street near Smithfield. But it’s all very tidy and tame and antiseptic and academic today. Not so then. A hundred tons of horse manure dropped on the streets of London every day. And that was just horses. Street names tell the story, give us just a whiff of what it must have been like. Street names like Hog Lane and Hog Yard and Pig Alley and Goat Street and Goat Yard and Mutton Lane and Lamb Alley and Pickle Herring Stairs and Bull Alley and Haunch of Venison Yard. Carnivorous London – what it ate – horses, cattle, sheep, pigs, fowl walked into London. Those animals were slaughtered in London. Butchered in London. Different story today of course. And that’s before you get to the exotic stuff. Exotic stuff attested to by names like Swan Alley and Parrot Alley and Lion Street and Lion Wharf and Leopard Court and Bear Alley and Dolphin Court and Magpie Court and Nightingale Lane and Pelican Stairs and Peacock Street and Black Eagle Street. I’m not saying those animals were on the menu for hungry Londoners, though some of them will have been. But there will have been some connection, some association. Those place names weren’t picked out of a hat. The words jungle and barnyard aren’t a bad fit for Regency London. And don’t get me started on micro-organisms. Oh, there, you’ve done it. You’ll wish you hadn’t. London’s cholera epidemics were fueled by London sewage. Charles Dickens was born in the middle of the Regency era. When he’s barely into middle age 278,000 tons of raw London sewage are daily sluiced and dumped into the Thames, along with offal and rubbish and every kind of filth a major city produces, to say nothing of pollutants from the factories that lined the banks of the river.
One parliamentary report said “strangers coming from the country frequently describe the streets of London as smelling of dung like a stable-yard.”
Indeed, think of Parliament having to go into recess because the stench was unbearable.
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Turn those figures into a micro-organisms census, by my back of an envelope calculations there were more micro-organisms in Regency London than there are stars in the universe. Astronomers reckon the universe could contain up to one septillion stars. A septillion is a one followed by 24 zeros. It’s said the human body contains trillions of microbes. If trillions of microbes can be rounded up to, say, a modest three trillion microbes 278,000 tons of sewage – and that’s just the sewage, remember – is going to give you rather more than a septillion microbes. There, that’s done it for you. The starry heavens will never look quite the same again will they.
But let’s go down some more Regency London Streets. Food production apart – well, animal products, that is – let’s look at workaday Regency London. Street names tell the story. Pipemakers Alley, Ropemakers Field, Leather Lane and Shoe Lane, Pepper Alley, Silk Street, Cinamon Street, Plumbers Street, Printers Place, Gunpowder Alley and Gravel Lane and Oatmeal Yard and Vinegar Yard and Onions Buildings and Hammer Alley and Porridge Pot Alley and no end of Bakers Courts and Brick Lanes and Glasshouse Courts and Limekiln Court and Limehouse Causeway. Those names waft us right there. Or, more precisely, they waft their smells our way. And any number of hammerings and shoutings and tintinabulations – all the aural racket and clamour that goes with production.
Or how about entertainment in Regency London? Shall we stop the Bowling Green? Or would you rather go to the Jockeys Field? Or The Archery? Or Darts Alley? Or how about Circus Street, shall we head down there?
My Regency London favourites though are the quirky ones, the ones that come out of the Regency grab-bag.
Some of them are a joy – they’re inviting, pretty, delightful. I’m thinking of Blossom Street and Friendly Place and Amicable Row and Mermaid Alley and Sweet Apple Court and Plum Pudding Row and Mulberry Court and Walnut Tree Walk and Hugging Lane and Appletree Yard and Peerless Pool and Honeysuckle Court.
Others, though. Well, gird your loins. Or at the very least, be prepared to wonder as you wonder.
I’m thinking of Harebrain Street. And Merlin’s Row. And Deadmans Place Burial Ground. How did that name come about? Was there a burial ground for men who weren’t dead?
And Tattle Alley. And Moonrakers Alley. I’ll take that one. I’d love to say I live in Moonrakers Alley. Reputation Row I’m not so sure. Where in the world did that name come from? Or how’s this for an assignation address? Meet me in Noah’s Ark Alley? Or how about if we meet at Adam and Eve Court? Or, if I’m being a little bit cheeky, a little bit forward, “See you at Cupid’s Court.” In that same vein, Naked Boys Alley. That’s probably too strong a come-on. Her reply to that might well be, a cool, “no, let’s make it Frosty Court.”
Anyone remember the Harry Enfield 1980s character Loadsamoney. He’d be right at home in Moneybag Alley in Regency London. And then there are those street names that are beyond dull – so much so that they intrigue. I’m thinking of Fifteen Foot Lane. And Boarded Entry. And Eight Houses. And Paved Alley. You can see what happened there. They just gave up on it, “oh sod it, call it Paved Alley and have done with it, I want to get to the pub.” Though Eight Bells Yard has a nice ring to it. Labour in Vain Yard, though, I think I’d give it a miss.
And to scrape the very bottom of the barrel, here’s where we’re not going to go on our Regency London Walk.
We’re not going to go to Cut Throat Lane. Either of them. That’s right, there were two of them. One was out east. The other just directly across the river from Parliament. Maybe the inspiration for the name came from you know where.
Anyway, yes, rest assured, we’ll give Cut Throat Lane 1 and Cut Throat Lane 2 a miss.
Ditto Dark House Lane. Ditto Dirty Lane. Ditto Monster Row. Ditto Stink House Bridge. Ditto Addle Hill. Actually, truth be told, I don’t give it a miss. It’s still with us. It’s in London’s Old Medieval Quarter. It means full of horse piss. And so we come to Laystall.
Another survivor, Laystall is over in London’s old Italian quarter. Just north of Hatton Garden and Leather Lane. Over Saffron Hill way. Saffron Hill. Now there’s a pretty name for you. Wasn’t a pretty place in Dickens’ day, though. It was the insalubrious setting for Fagin’s Den in Oliver Twist. And sure enough, Laystall means a tip. Worse than a tip. A tip and a latrine. A place of refuse and dung. And you can top that up with its It’s obsolete meaning: a burial place. Yuck.
I have to confess. Every time I go by there the thought crosses my mind, do the people who live here know the history of this place? Do they know what a laystall was? Have they looked the word laystall up? Do they know what it means?
Anyway, there you go. We’ve just been all over Regency London. Well, the more colourful bits of it.
Let’s hear it from Carol Duffy again: we stared at the view, till the time where they lived reappeared. Mostly in words.
London words. London names. To borrow and paraphrase Keats’ great line, how you can not be half in love with the easeful past?
You’ve been listening to This… is London, the London Walks podcast. Emanating from www.walks.com –
home of London Walks,
London’s signature walking tour company.
London’s local, time-honoured, fiercely independent, family-owned, just-the-right-size walking tour company.
And as long as we’re at it, London’s multi-award-winning walking tour company. Indeed, London’s only award-winning walking tour company.
And here’s the secret: London Walks is essentially run as a guides’ cooperative.
That’s the key to everything.
It’s the reason we’re able to attract and keep the best guides in London. You can get schlubbers to do this for £20 a walk. But you cannot get world-class guides – let alone accomplished professionals.
It’s not rocket science: you get what you pay for.
And just as surely, you also get what you don’t pay for.
Back in 1968 when we got started we quickly came to a fork in the road. We had to answer a searching question: Do we want to make the most money? Or do we want to be the best walking tour company in the world?
You want to make the most money you go the schlubbers route. You want to be the best walking tour company in the world you do whatever you have to do
to attract and keep the best guides in London –
you want them guiding for you, not for somebody else.
Bears repeating:
the way we’re structured – a guides’ cooperative –
is the key to the whole thing.
It’s the reason for all those awards, it’s the reason people who know go with London Walks, it’s the reason we’ve got a big following, a lively, loyal, discerning following – quality attracts quality.
It’s the reason we’re able – uniquely – to front our walks with accomplished, in many cases distinguished professionals:
By way of example, Stewart Purvis, the former Editor
(and subsequently CEO) of Independent Television News.
And Lisa Honan, who had a distinguished career as a diplomat (Lisa was the Governor of St Helena, the island where Napoleon breathed his last and, some say, had his penis amputated – Napoleon didn’t feel a thing – if thing’s the mot juste – he was dead.)
Stewart and Lisa – both of them CBEs – are just a couple of our headline acts.
Or take our Ripper Walk. It’s the creation of the world’s leading expert on Jack the Ripper, Donald Rumbelow, the author of the definitive book on the subject. Britain’s most distinguished crime historian, Donald is, in the words of The Jack the Ripper A to Z, “internationally recognised as the leading authority on Jack the Ripper.” Donald’s emeritus now but he’s still the guiding light on our Ripper Walk. He curates the walk. He trains up and mentors our Ripper Walk guides. Fields any and all questions they throw at him.
The London Walks Aristocracy of Talent – its All-Star Team of Guides – includes a former London Mayor. It includes the former Chief Music Critic for the Evening Standard. It includes the Chair of the Association of Professional Tour Guides. And the former chair of the Guild of Guides.
It includes barristers, doctors, geologists, museum curators, a former London Museum archaeologist, historians,
university professors (one of them a distinguished Cambridge University paleontologist); it includes a criminal defence lawyer, Royal Shakespeare Company and National Theatre actors, a bevy of MVPs, Oscar winners (people who’ve won the big one, the Guide of the Year Award)…
well, you get the idea.
As that travel writer famously put it, “if this were a golf tournament, every name on the Leader Board would be a London Walks guide.”
And as we put it: London Walks Guides make the new familiar
and the familiar new.
And on that agreeable note…
come then, let us go forward together on some great London Walks.
And that’s by way of saying, Good walking and Good Londoning one and all. See ya next time.